Rabbit Punch (Part Seven)
BY GREGORY HEDGEPETH
Cover image by Виктория Бородинова from Pixabay. Cover art by Gregory Hedgepeth.
I grabbed the briefcase off my desk and rushed out, excited to see my wife’s face after a long week of being stuck at the office. I hoped she was just as eager too see me as it’d been weeks since we’d been able to secure a night out together. The office lights were dimmed low and the floor was mouse-quiet as everyone had already left long ago. People had been discussing their New Year’s Eve plans all morning, and for the first time in a while, I felt ready for whatever was in store for me.
I made my way to the elevator bay, and was inches away from pressing the button, when I noticed a light on inside Hampton’s office. I checked my watch and saw that it was well past eight. I was running behind, but I was curious to why someone would be in his office so late. He was notorious for leaving his door unlocked, but considering the circumstances, I worried someone was doing something nefarious inside and hoping they wouldn’t be caught.
I inched towards the door and turned the knob as slowly as I could, wanting to make sure I got the jump on whoever was trespassing. I jerked the door open and lurched inside to see him sitting there, sobbing violently with his head on the desk. “Hampton?” I asked with a confused face. “You’re still here?” He lifted his head slowly and seemed to stare right through me without bothering to mutter a response. I studied him closely, but he barely moved. I couldn’t even tell if he was breathing. “Hey, are you okay?”
He continued to look off into space for several more moments before seemingly waking from a daydream, finally acknowledging my presence in the room. “BISHOP! What’s good, my nigga!” He let out a loud laugh and poured a crimson elixir into a glass filled to the brim with ice. He took several gulps from the drink and belched loudly.
I inched my way to his desk in disbelief. “What the hell are you still doing here? I thought you left a long time ago. And why are you drinking so hard? You know if Jessica is going to shit bricks if catches you like this.”
He stood and looked me squarely in the eye, swallowing the remainder of his drink. “You want some?”
“Ham—“
“Man, fuck Jessica! Okay? Be a man. Do you want a drink or not?”
I shook my head. “Hampton, I gotta get outta here. I can’t be fucking around tonight... Krystina is waiting on me. What’s going on with you?”
“Today’s a celebration, right? New Year’s Eve and shit—another goddamn year of the same boring-ass 365 days for the umpteenth time,” he spat out as if the words tasted bitter to his tongue. “This VP shit just doesn’t do it for me anymore... it’s time for Jessica to let me run this place in peace. I mean, hell, that’s basically what I’m doing anyway, right? And I could be doing a lot more if she just stopped giving me so much resistance. It’s a fucking embarrassment.”
I tossed him a concerned look. “What’s going on with you? You look like you’re going through it, man. I really need to get home, but I can’t leave you like this—are you sure you’re okay?”
“Maybe I should take care of it myself,” he said in a tone that didn’t sound like sarcasm. “I mean, what are the chances of me actually getting caught?“ He stared at me for several seconds before howl-laughing as my eyes grew wide. “Ahhhhhh, look at your face! You’re always so scared I’m going to do something to her—you still can’t tell when I’m fucking with you!” He swallowed more of the drink and tossed the glass back on the coaster so hard I thought it was going to split in half. “I really do hate that bitch though.”
“Hampton, hey... what’s up? Do you need to talk about something? You’re really not acting like yourself.”
He looked in my direction with a scrunched face. “I’ve never been better, man,” he said before belting out another loud laugh and pouring another drink. He tipped the glass in my direction. “You sure you don’t want any? This is some fire-ass shit.”
“What the hell are you drinking?”
“It’s called Rabbit Punch. I’ve been making it since college. You only need one sip and then—pow! It hits you right in the back of the head!” He howled another laugh. “You barely even see it coming. One minute you’re all there and then, bam, it’s all over... just that quick. Here man, sit down and have a drink with your boy. You’ll be all loosed and goosed when it’s time to give K the ol’ eggplant tonight.”
I gulped and shook my head no. “Are you sure you’re okay? I feel like you’re crying out for help right now or something.”
“Crying out for help? That’s what it feels like for you right now? I’m trying to keep things light with you and you’re being a real bitch about it. Crying out for help?! That’s what you think this is?!!” he roared, growing enraged as his nostrils flared. Almost instantly, the anger melted from his eyes. He breathed in deep and took a moment to compose himself before taking another sip from the glass. “So you want to know what’s going on? What’s really going on?” He shook his head and stared off into space. “Honestly... I’m just tired of this shit. Tired of living this phony-ass life. It ain’t worth it anymore.”
I looked at him incredulously. “Hampton, what are you talking about? You have everything any man could ever want—“
“What did you say? You think... this is everything?” he said, shaking his head as if he couldn’t comprehend what I was saying. “This... this is nothing. This is the tip of the iceberg. That’s what’s wrong with everyone around here. You all think so little of yourselves. You meekly accept whatever is shoved in your direction, no matter if it’s a pound of fish or a pile of shit. This company doesn’t even own the market share! And you think this is everything a man could ever want—that this is all I’m worthy of? How dare you assume such little ambition of me while not demanding enough from yourself?”
He gulped down another swallow of the drink as I sighed. I wasn’t getting through to him. I had to try something else. “What about Jo, man? Your kids? They love you to death. You know how many people would kill to have a wife and family like yours?”
He went to pour yet another drink and I walked around the desk to intercept before things got even more out of hand. I could tell he’d had more than enough and it was only going to get worse if I didn’t stop him. I had my hand on the glass when he attempted to snatch it back from me, causing it to slip from his grasp and shatter against the floor. His eyes glared. “Fuck, Bishop! Do you have any idea how expensive that shit is? I should kick your ass!”
I ignored his anger, placing my hands on his shoulders. “Hampton, didn’t you hear what I said? What about Josephine and Brendan and your babygirl Nola? How would they feel if they knew you were in here talking like this right now?”
He began to sniffle and collapsed against his desk, sobbing and slurring his words. I couldn’t tell if I’d finally gotten through to him or if he was just heartbroken over his fractured glass. “I really tried to love her, man. Seriously... but Jo... she ain’t it. She ain’t the one.”
My eyes grew to the size of saucers. “What are you taking about? Jo is the perfect wife, man. She’s gorgeous and smart—“
He waved me off. “All that shit is artificial. It’s window dressing. Hell, there’s lots of women who are beautiful and intelligent from good families and all that other bullshit that they say is supposed to matter. But at the end of the day, it’s not what’s important. It’s about compatibility. It’s about laughing at the same jokes and wanting to be around one another. It’s about knowing you can trust them with the truth and being certain they have your best interests at heart. You know, before he left, my father always used to say your wife and your best friend are supposed to be the same person. But that wasn’t the case with him and Mama—and I’m beginning to see that it isn’t the case with me and Jo either. Because Daytona is my best friend... and I’m finally ready to accept that she’s right: I married the wrong person.”
“Whoa, Hampton—what the fuck? Are you really telling me you don’t want to be with Jo anymore? You two are perfect together! I can’t believe what I’m hearing.”
He slumped into his chair. “If I could just end it all tomorrow, I would. I’m fucking tired of it. I’m tired of it all! I’m tired of this job. I’m tired of trying to support her fucking lifestyle. I’m tired of living with the decisions I’ve made. I know so much more now than I knew back then—why shouldn’t I receive a bigger reward for that wisdom than just hindsight? Why should I have to live with my youthful mistakes forever? It’s fucking bullshit!” He picked up the crystal carafe containing the rest of the Rabbit Punch and launched it against the wall, shattering it into a million pieces. He slouched back into his chair, clearly beside himself. “I just... wish I could end it all, brudda. I’m tired of living this lie.” He began to cry again and this time the tears didn’t let up for several uncomfortable moments.
I walked over to console him, but ended up only placing my hand on his shoulder. “Hampton, you can’t...”
He shook from my grasp and stood, pacing back and forth. “I know, I know... l can’t leave her. I’ll never leave her. Even if I’ve fallen out of love with her, we’re stuck together for life. I can’t let my kids grow up with divorced parents like I did. Don’t you see what that does to people? That’s why we’re all so fucked up now. Folks just drop their families off in New Lorraine and there’s no repercussions. I can’t let that be my story too. And I’m not going to do that to my kids.” He fell back down into his chair and sat still for several moments while I stared at him. He placed his head down against his desk, finally appearing calm and breathing normally.
I let out a heavy sigh. I couldn’t believe what was going on his head or why he was so stressed. Hampton had a life that was the envy of just about everyone inside the company. I had to assume it was just the alcohol driving him to say things he didn’t mean. Drunk or not, I had to make sure he got home okay. As I was lost in my thoughts, I heard a light snore coming from the underside of the desk and saw that he’d fallen asleep.
I pulled out my phone to call Krystina, knowing she was likely to cuss me out as I was already running behind. “Hey babe, it’s me. Listen... don’t be mad at me, but we’re gonna miss our reservation. I’m still at the office. An emergency came up. Yes, I know it’s New Year’s Eve. Yes, I know we’re paying a driver $400 an hour tonight. Babe, 45 minutes tops, okay? I promise. We can still make the party, we just won’t have dinner beforehand. I’ll take you to Butter’s after. So now you’re too good for Butter’s all of a sudden? Babe, seriously... go ahead and finished getting dressed. Yes, I know your makeup took a long time to do. I’ll hop right in the shower as soon as I get there and we’ll be outta the house by 9:45 at the latest. Okay—okay... okay. I know... yeah, I know you want to kick my ass. I’ll call you as soon as I’m on the way. I love you too.” I shoved the phone back into my pocket before walking over to a semi-conscious Hampton and tossing his arm over my shoulder. I set a mental reminder to hire a cleaner to handle the mess in the morning as he snored in his stupor. I dragged him to the elevator bay and hit the lobby button, doing my best to keep him upright as he swayed in his drunkenness.
“You’re a... you’re a good... you’re a good motherfucker, Bishop,” he let out with a bench, coming to for a brief moment. “I mean that, man. You... you always... you always do the right thing.”
“I hear you, man. I’m just going to make sure you get home without killing yourself or someone else.”
“See? I told you—you’re a good... a good...” his voice faded off as he started to fall unconscious again. The bell dinged loudly, indicating the elevator’s arrival and jerked him awake just before he fell to the ground. I pulled his full weight into the elevator and leaned him against the steel wall as we descended into the depths below.
***
“Oh my God, Bishop, stop it!” Josephine said, pushing my hands away playfully and pulling her dress back down below her waist. “You’re going to get us caught.”
“Who’s gonna catch us?” I asked slyly, running my fingers along her skin. “You knew what tonight was. You should’ve thought about that before you came up in here looking all sexy.”
“I’m not looking sexy,” she said feigning modesty. “These are just regular clothes.”
“Shit, that dress ain’t regular clothes. And you know what that color does to me. God created it specifically for your skin tone.”
“Oh my God, Bishop. You have to stop this right now. You know I’ve barely been out the house since I got rid of the baby. I’m not in the mood to be feeling all lusty.”
“I just miss you, Jo,” I said, running my hands along her body and smooching the nape of her neck. “I haven’t been able to talk to you or see that beautiful face in over a week. I wasn’t even sure you were still on for this until I saw you give the signal about the drinks.”
She sighed heavily. “Hampton’s just been hovering so much lately. I think he feels really bad that I didn’t want to keep it.”
“Do you think he knows?”
“Hell, I have no idea at this point. This is just... it’s so much. And it’s so fast. I can’t believe we’re really doing this.”
My face scrunched suspiciously. “Jo, are you getting cold feet on me? I thought you were ready to go away together? Life is short! Why would you want to keep wasting it with someone you don’t love?”
“Will you keep your voice down? I’m not one hundred percent sure everyone is passed out yet,” she said, pressing her ear to the door.
“I just want to know what it’s going to take? I love you and Hampton doesn’t. How much longer are you planning to give me half of you? Because I don’t know how much more I can wait.”
She swallowed hard. “I told you we’re going to get there, babe. You’re asking... you’re asking so much of me right now. You and K don’t have what we have. There’s just a lot more at stake for me and the kids. I don’t know if I feel comfortable with you putting this kind of pressure on me.” I exhaled sharply. I was growing frustrated. It had been months since I’d revealed to her what Hampton had told me, and even though things had progressed quickly between us, she still appeared to be stalling on taking this to the level I wanted. “I just... I need more time. We just lost the baby and everything. I don’t know if I still want to do this. Just because everyone is passed out doesn’t mean it’s too late for us to turn back.”
“Fine! I thought you were serious about this,” I said, growing angry and shaking my head. “Take all the time you need, Jo. I told K to stay home, so I could sneak looks at you all night and you still don’t see that I’m willing to give it all up for you. I don’t care what it takes.”
“You really mean that?” she asked with a curiously raised eyebrow.
I looked her squarely in the eye and stood with her nose to nose. “I told Hampton a long time ago that a man would kill to have what he had—I meant it then and I mean it now,” I said sternly.
She looked at me with a tear in her eye and shook her head. She had mentioned several times how much she loved and hated my persistence. Suddenly, a smile appeared beneath the crying as if it were a sun rising above the horizon. “That’s all I needed to hear, baby. I just wanted to make sure you were serious about this,” she pulled me close and kissed me deeply, pulling her blade from its sheath. “Let’s get this done. It’s been six minutes. The gas should’ve knocked everyone under by now.”
My eyes lit up. She gave me an excited smile and another quick kiss before hugging my neck and darting out the room. A sinister grin spread across my face as I walked over and grabbed my machete from its resting spot atop the desk. I bolted out the study, just in time to see Josephine hurdling over the incapacitated bodies and bounding up the stairs two-by-two.
***
I sat there frozen in my chair, still unsure if I’d done enough to convince the detective of my innocence. My fingers tapped against the metal table as I tried to recall exactly what I had said and the tone in which I’d said it. He had pressed hard about exactly how much I’d drank and which rooms I’d seen inside the house, which items I’d touched and all that I remembered before passing out.
I rubbed my hands together to ease the room’s bitter cold, contemplating everything I had done to Hampton the night before. Even hours later, it still hadn’t settled in my mind just how vicious I had become in the moment. The rage that lived inside me as I had carved into his body felt inconceivable less than a day later.
I don’t think I’d really considered what we had planned up until the moment it was time to hack the meat from his bones. But once I started the violence, it felt almost impossible to stop. It was like I was possessed. Before I’d been at it even a few minutes, half his ribcage was exposed and his flesh was bloody and ragged. A blind rage had taken over me and Josephine seemed shocked at my brutality as I inhaled several deep breaths. Hampton had been a decent enough boss, but he had never done anything to deserve that level of savagery from me. At first, I thought that maybe something was wrong with me or that I had some sort of unbridled bloodlust I hadn’t made peace with yet. But the more I looked at her face, even though it was frozen in fear at what I’d done, I began to realize that it had nothing to do with Hampton—he was just a means to an end. And that means was Josephine. I would do anything to see her happy and by my side.
As I sat inside the interrogation room waiting for the detective to return, I noticed Hampton’s blood dried into the palms of my hands and my mind drifted to his wife and how I’d managed to fall in love so quickly. It was so much better than anything I could ever imagine with K. Whenever I saw Jo, it was different than excitement. It felt like my insides were glowing with a celestial heat. It was like I had no control over my smile or how quickly my heart quivered when I was near her. She could’ve asked me to follow her to the ends of the earth and I would’ve done it just to bathe in her warmth of her presence. And once it settled in my mind just how much I cared for her, it became a lot easier to justify what I’d done to Hampton. With him out of the way, there was nothing stopping me and Jo from being together.
I smiled to myself wickedly just as Detective Giovanni burst inside the door. “Hey Mr. Faire, you’re good to go. Follow me,” he said plainly, exiting back out almost as quickly as he’d arrived.
I kept the smile plastered to my face as I walked out to the processing desk. The sun shined through the large windows and I could tell it was a beautiful day outside. I signed several forms with his deputy before being handed a bag containing two phones, my wallet and keys.
“We’re going to figure out who did this. I can assure you of that,” he said confidently with a shake of the hand. He looked down and noticed the dried blood still stuck to my palms. “There’s a washroom around the corner there if you want to wash up.”
“No thanks,” I said, waving him off. “At this point, I’m just ready to get home and lather up in my own shower.” I stepped out the door and took in a deep whiff of the warm afternoon air. Everything had gone to plan. I took a few steps down the walkway when I noticed Jo sitting in the parking lot, crying inside a police cruiser. I knocked against the glass and she quickly wiped her tears away before stepping outside the car. “Hey, you okay?”
“I’m just taking it harder than I expected, I guess,” she said somberly. “Like... things are so real to me now. He’s actually gone.”
I gave her a warm smile. “It’s all over now, babe. I told you they wouldn’t be able to to hold us for too long. We just had to keep our heads about us. It happened just like I said it would.”
“I guess you have a point. I just never thought that—I don’t know... that I would miss him.”
I let out a sigh. I couldn’t make heads or tails of what Jo was saying. This should’ve been a victory for us, but she was making it feel like a loss. I reached out to touch her. “Babe—“
She shook her head and avoided my grasp. “Look, the deputy is going to give me a ride home in a few. I’m just waiting for her to come out.”
“Okay cool,” I said, trying my best not to feel rejected. “I can’t wait to get home and hit that shower. I really need some fresh clothes. How about I bring dinner over tonight for you and the kids?”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“Why not?”
She went silent for several moments before suddenly bursting into a fit of tears. “Bishop, I can’t do this!”
My face scrunched in confusion. “Do what? Hampton’s out the way. Now all we have to do is...”
“I can’t be with you.”
My eyes grew wide. “Jo, what... what are you saying? We just took care of the problem. He’s gone now!”
She shook her head and appeared distraught. “I can’t believe I did this to my kids. They don’t deserve this. I don’t know why it took all this for me to see how selfish I’ve been. What we did... it was a huge mistake. But... I just... I’m sorry, okay?”
“Jo—“
The deputy burst through the door and made her way towards the car. Josephine opened the door and slinked back inside the cruiser, sobbing deeper and deeper as I stood there with my mouth hanging open. The deputy asked if I needed a ride and I shook my head no, informing her I was going to wait for the bus instead. She gave me a weak smile. “She’ll be okay once she sees her kids.” She hopped inside, and almost immediately, the cruiser lurched to life and sped off down the road. I stood in the middle of the parking lot in disbelief, trying to piece together what had just happened. I couldn’t believe Jo was doing this to me after everything we’d done, after everything we’d been to one another.
I walked over to the bus stop and sat there in shock for several minutes, trying to make sense of things. I’d done exactly what she asked and it still wasn’t enough. All I wanted was to see her happy, but I’d still fallen short somehow. It felt like a kick to the gut. An older couple walked up to the bus stop, plopping down beside me on the bench. They kissed and cuddled and it made me feel like throwing up. I remember wanting to grow old with Jo and she’d thrown it all away on a whim, due to her own guilt. The more I watched the couple, the more my anger towards Jo began to grow.
Before I knew it, an evil thought popped into my head and persisted despite my best efforts. I told myself to think better of it and just to make it home. I shook my head and a tear began to run down my face. No matter how much I wished the thought away, it refused to subside. I let out a heavy breath and stood from the bench before walking back across the street to the police station.
Just as I stepped inside, I saw Giovanni coming up the hallway. “Detective, I need to speak with you,” I let out sternly.
“Hey there, Mr. Faire, is everything—“
“It was me. It was us!” I screamed loudly. “It was me and Jo!”
“What—“
“We did it! We were supposed to run away together next week. We’re the ones who carved him up. We’re the ones who spread his blood all over the house! Everyone else was knocked out downstairs. It was us!”
The detective’s face scrunched in horror. “You’re telling me you two conspired to murder Mr. Hamilton?”
“We’ve been planning it for weeks, maybe even months. Hampton told me he didn’t want to be with her anymore. I told her what he said, hoping they’d be able to work things out. But I just...” I paused, staring off into space. “I never thought things would get this far—I just thought I could make her happy. But I knew Hampton would never leave her and I was tired of living a lie! It was us, goddamit! Call your deputy and tell her she’s in the car with a killer!”
Detective Giovanni let out a sigh as several officers pulled their guns on me. “Mr. Faire, Mrs. Hamilton has already confessed to the murder.”
I looked at him in disbelief. “But I just saw her—“
“I know it’s unusual circumstances, but out of respect for her husband and all he’s done for the community, we allowed her a few hours to speak with her children and get some affairs in order before she turned herself in later this evening. She told us about the knockout gas, how she secured the code for Miss York’s bedroom, even how she had second thoughts throughout the night—but she never mentioned anything about a romance between you two. Or the fact that you helped her kill Mr. Hamilton. In fact, when we pressed her on it, she insisted that she acted alone.”
My eyes grew wide. “What? Wait, you... you knew?”
“My captain would take my badge if he knew I let a confessed killer leave the station. But it just didn’t seem right—“
“So you just let her go? You really think she’s going to come back here? You have no idea what she’s capable of!”
“That’s where you’re wrong, Mr. Faire. I‘ve seen first hand what she’s capable of. But I’ve also seen her crumple into a withering mess at the mention of what this will do to her kids. Even if she doesn’t deserve an ounce of pity, they deserve to see their mother one last time before their lives go to hell.”
I swallowed hard as tears began to rush down my cheeks. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. “You mean she never even said anything about us? Not even a word?”
“If I remember correctly, she stated that she just wanted to be rid of a man who didn’t love her anymore. I gotta be honest—I was skeptical, but she didn’t let on that there was any sort of assistance. I suspected that Mr. McMahon may have been her paramour until I saw her reaction to such a claim. Not long after, she confessed to writing the suicide note... and everything else.”
I collapsed to the floor in a fit of rage. Not only had Jo discarded me, she didn’t even want to let on that we were involved. I wasn’t sure if it was because she never had any intention of us being together or if she was simply try to keep me out of jail. Either way, it didn’t matter now.
Detective Giovanni walked over to me as I pounded the floor in a feeble-minded tantrum. “Mr. Faire, you are under arrest for the murder of Hampton Hamilton,” he said calmly, pulling out his cuffs. “You have the right to remain silent—anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.”
“No... no, this isn’t fair!”
“You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford to hire a lawyer, we will appoint one to practice on your behalf against the state of Mississippi...”
“No!”
The handcuffs clasped around my wrists and I felt like a fool as things finally became clear to me. She wanted to be totally rid of me and now she would be. Even if she’d confessed and actually planned to go down for Hampton’s murder, it wouldn’t have stopped me from calling and writing her in prison everyday. I loved her that much. But now, it was all for naught because I’d never be able to see or touch or kiss or talk to her ever again. Despite my best efforts, Jo was getting exactly what she wanted, and I never even saw it coming.
Gregory Hedgepeth is the editor-in-chief of Vital Narrative Press. You can follow him on Facebook, Instagram or Twitter. Feel free to follow on all three. Or maybe just two. Yeah, two’s probably good—he’s not that interesting. Gregory Hedgepeth is also the author of MISCONCEPTIONS ABOUT SUNRISES, THE YEAR THAT ANSWERED and A COLLECTION OF ECHOES. BUY THAT SHIT.